Monday, March 22, 2010
The Realms of the Gods, Book 4 in the Immortals series
#1- Numair and Daine.
Yuck, gick, gross, blech. Do I need to explain? Probably, but hopefully not! He’s 30 she’s 16. Alright, so I guess I understand that Tamora Pierce is going for the whole medieval thing, and in that context I suppose it wasn’t uncommon etc, etc. But seriously, all the sexual tension made me throw up in my mouth a little (not to mention the graphic hot all over kisses, oh god, I can’t even go into the description, it’s putting me off my coffee).
#2- the Gods
Great Mother Goddess are they boring! No but seriously, if my mom got killed and then I ran into her as a goddess I’m guessing I wouldn’t be rolling my eyes sighing over the same old arguments we had three years ago before she died.
At least not for the first week, but lets be frank, after the first week the novelty is over no matter if she’s dead or I just haven’t seen her for 4 months.
Look I’m 31, I know how to cut potatoes, really, I do. In fact, I’m considered a rather good cook in circles unbeknownst to my mom so seriously no need to hang around the kitchen gripping about how you think I cut them so small or I might have to stab you myself and save the bandits the trouble.
#3- How many times is Tortall going to be overrun by invaders??!
What in heavens name is the Dominion Jewel good for? It certainly takes a lot of the Bang out of Alanna’s big death defying adventure to get it. And after the big finale of book three it seems rather insane that Ozorne has fallen through the cracks to come back again, I can let the first two books slide on it being a build up, but after book three we need a new threat.
#4- I love Kitten and Zek…Where are Kitten and Zek??!
They’re basically not in this book, LAME-O. You can’t introduce great characters who add to a story and then remove them at the big finale. Zek gets one teeny tiny mention but isn’t even apparent in the entire 368 page book! So where is he?? I thought he was inseparable from Daine??
Of all the books Tamora Pierce has written, this is the only one that ever fell short of the mark, and I’ve read 20 of her books so far. So I suppose she’s allowed one dud.
On the plus side:
It clearly wraps up Daines story enough that I’m happy to just have her as a peripheral character in the other Tortall books.
It also introduces the lovely, fun and thoroughly enjoyable Darklings (who come back fantastically in the two Trickster books). “Funfunfunfun” might be the best line and moment of book 4.
But two pluses do not a novel make! So read the last book, just to keep in the loop for the ongoing story, but don’t expect to be kept up at night with the excitement of it. Just try to stay awake while you read, and if Numair and Daine gross you out as much as me…make sure not to eat for at least two hour before you read (It’s like swimming, better to be safe then sorry).
The Realms of the Gods, By Tamora Pierce
Published by Simon Pulse, Dec 2005